How unbelievably narcissistic and self-centered are a copious amount of today’s children? Well, they are such monumental narcissists that there is a tree overlooking a pond somewhere thinking, “WOW, those kids are self-centered”!

NarcissusWhy is it that these “I DESERVE everything” wankers are so incredibly delusional? Because in today’s bubble wrapped society we actually give out trophies for PARTICIPATING!!!! Yes, they are handing out trophies to these rusty blade lanced boils just for showing up. If there is a larger disservice to these children’s futures I cannot think of it. Oh wait, yes I can! Letting your children use YOUR credit card without any limitations whatsoever! THAT teaches them to be selfish, self-aggrandizing, irresponsible, load monkeys! This is your captain speaking, and if you look out the left side of the plane you will see the world famous Poverty Canyon.

The reality is that their parents are to blame because they have instilled upon these thunder humps that they can do anything they put their mind(s) to. This is like convincing the sticky finger, little lard nuggets that if they truly believe in Santa he will appear on Christmas Eve. There is absolutely NOTHING wrong with imagination, but parents are taking this “everyone is special” society WAY too far. You know what? Everyone is NOT special! Your kid is not a genius, he’s not the second coming, he is exactly like everyone else – AVERAGE!Miley_tounge

But not to worry my minions, these parents will get their comeuppance when little Dakota has to move home because she thought it was okay to wear flip flops to her one and only job interview. Does this Miley Cyrus loving muffin top realize the egregious fashion error she has made? Absolutely not, she blames the interviewer as the reason why she wasn’t hired on as upper management with a corner office and a starting salary of $238,000 a year.

Have you seen the commercial that says, “If she can do it, so can you”? This is a lie. Not only is it a lie, but it’s also astronomically condescending. Look at Shelly, she studied hard in high school, got into the college she wanted, continued on to graduate school, and is now a successful member of society. Well if she can do it, so can you. This is true ONLY if you have the brains, the drive, the sacrifice, and the wherewithal to see something hard through to the end. Most kids today think they deserve that type of life without putting in all the hard work. Why? Well because mommy and daddy told them they are special and handed them everything they ever wanted without exception.Tricycle

How about we start telling these horrible children that failure is actually a good thing instead of picking them up every time they fall. We learn from our mistakes, and if we don’t, well too bad – you’re an idiot! Are we going to keep kids on their tricycles because we don’t want them to fall when they learn to ride a two-wheeled bike?Greg_Jorts I guarantee you there are parents out there who will do this and will then question why their loser 38-year-old son is still living in the basement. Good! That’s what you deserve for being a Taco Bell, full diaper load of a parent.

The ONLY way this generation of egotistical, jort wearing, sub-intellectual, Twitter knobs is EVER going to stand on their own two feet is if parents give them the tools to do so. Making excuses, paying for EVERYTHING, not establishing boundaries, IS NOT good parenting. Children NEED to be taught that their actions have consequences; they NEED to understand what it is to actually work hard for what they want and that mommy and daddy aren’t always going to be there to bail them out. While we may have to write off this current generation of slacked-jawed yokels, we as a society have to set the ship right. So STOP giving them everything, STOP telling them they are great, and for the love of God, STOP coddling them! Oh, and give them a punch to the face for me.


  1. I hate you.

  2. Actually, a huge percentage of the world’s population would argue that MY kid is special. Just sayin’.

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