Conspiracy theorists are all around us; they are your neighbors, your dentist, your nanny, your average Fox News viewer, and most definitely your local bat shit crazy homeless guy who thinks H.R Puffinstuf was a documentary. What is it that these people have in common? They all want to believe something so bad that they will ignore data and facts in order to support theipuffinstuffr retarded narrative. You know who else does this? Republican and Democrat supporters; seriously listen to them spew forth their over generalizations and stunted simplification of each other’s party. “Oh you’re a republican then you MUST believe this”. Sorry folks but the moose out front should have told you…

Whether or not these intellectual midgets actually believe their ramblings is unclear to me. They may stand on their balsa wood soapboxes shouting to the squirrels about a worldwide cabal of 10 people, three aliens and a domesticated spider that control a worldwide government. But when they are tucked in at night in their Powder Puff sheets do they really believe this? I simply don’t know.volcano

Some of the more persistent conspiracy theories that just won’t go away despite the Krakatoa eruption level of conflicting data are simply incredulous. These people should NOT be allowed to breed. There is no reason we need more raving lunatics running around spewing forth their rambling diatribes.

Here is a list of some of the more popular conspiracy theories that some of these shock therapy candidates believe:

  • AIDS was created by the CIA to kill homosexuals
  • The 1969 moon landing was faked
  • September 11th was set up by the US governmentfirststep
  • Barack Obama wasn’t born in the US
  • The Holocaust never happened
  • The response by George W to the Katrina flood was slow because he doesn’t like black people
  • The Snuggle Bear is the anti-christ (oh wait this one is actually true)
  • Vaccines cause autism
  • President Roosevelt knew in advance of Pearl Harbor
  • The human race is an experiment by an alien race
  • Believe my religion or go to hell
  • Crack cocaine was invented by the white man to keep black people down
  • There is a war against Christmas
  • Jewish people control the banking system
  • The deaths of Princess Diana and Dodi Fayed were arranged by British Special Forces operatives.
  • Paul McCartney’s band mates secretly covered up his death in a 1966 car accident
  • Ebola was invented for population control

If you believe any of these nut-rageous theories you really might want take two minutes out of your day to do some research. Unless of course finding out the truth will set your world on fire and you feel better believing in a fairly tale world where iPads grow on trees and clouds are made of cotton candy. Because the truth is extremely easy to find if you want. All you have to do is spend a few minutes on the Interslice and you can cross check EVERY single fact 483 times.recorder

If anyone can rationally explain to me why people would rather believe their particular brand of lunacy over researching the truth PLEASE let me know. I simply cannot grasp the microscopic level of intelligence of these folks who don’t care one iota about the truth and fact. Wait. Did you just hear a tape recorder start?



  1. Are you one of those intellectually deficient dolts that still believes that the Nazis were “bad people”? Are you so blind that you think the president of Chase bank was named Ira Finklestein on accident? Are you seriously spewing forth the proposition that the 1969 (hehe 69) moon landing was real, even after we have the irrefutable truth in the documentary Capricorn One that it was all a sham?! Well then fine sir, I say good day. Good day!

    P.S. Obama was born in a donkey’s asshole, and I believe that donkey was located in El Salvador! Good day!

  2. Thanks for reminding me about Snuggle Bear … now I can’t sleep. Have you seen this horrifying ad where he cackles at the misfortune of an adorable hedgehog? <>

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